The Frame of 10 years that brings in 2014!

I have always heard of 10 years cycles economically, biologically, financially and otherwise but I never felt as if it applied to me until November 30th, 2013. Stan died that day. He came into our lives 10 years earlier in November 2003.

His demanding, full and joyful life and his sudden devastating death frames the last ten years of my life given he marked his presence all over it. He demanded attention for the entire 10 years he graced us with his regal presence and had the entire household, including his younger brother Caesar, all wrapped around his graceful paws i.e. if Stan was in a bad mood the entire household was on notice to stay out of his space and when he wanted to play, we all dropped everything to play. That was just the way it always was from Day 1.

And the truth is (I am not ashamed to admit it) Stan held the family together during our most difficult years when my Husband and I almost lost our way. We were both afraid to make any permanent decisions since the first silent question on both our minds was always "And Stan?".

In embracing the length and breadth of Stan's life during his last two months with me after his multiple strokes which left him blind and confused within 24 hours, I was forced to look back at the highs and lows of my own life during the last ten years. I started this ten year frame in a new house on the water, in Florida (boasting Enrique Iglesias as our neighbor) at the height of my Husband's business (later to become the "height" of life/work lessons that will forever scar us both but also brought us great wisdom) and I end this ten year cycle in a new home in Dubai overlooking the Burj Khalifa about to begin some amazing new adventures. 

And in between all of this, I moved to Trinidad, I then moved to Tobago to save my soul,  I experienced my lowest moments of utter darkness during which I truly thought I would not make it out the tunnel, I encountered breath-taking acts of kindness and humanity, I witnessed unbelievable hatred and trials, I lost my father, I found profound beautiful friendships, I had lots of money and I had no money,  I developed unquestionable faith in God, I lived my dreams out loud, I created a Foundation that I know will change the world, I discovered my gift, talent and life purpose and most importantly in this decade I FOUND AND BECAME ME. What a decade right? However I have to wonder if I would survive and thrive through another decade like this last one?

And as I sit here on the edge of 2014's awakening, I know with certainty I have no idea what the next 10 years will bring i.e. I have no clue where I will be living nor am I sure what I may be doing. It is my unique journey in "becoming". 

What I do know if I have any say in the next Frame is that my soul will wander geography as much as possible, it will try to connect and conspire with as many souls from all walks of life as it can, it will pollinate and give birth to immeasurable new ideas and adventures, it will sharpen it's curious nature and learn something different every single day, it will comfortably hug life's darkest lessons understanding it's significance in the soul's growth, it will love profoundly, laugh heartedly, dance wildly, and occupy to the brim the absolute length and breadth of the space and time given.    

On Dec 1, 2013, less than 24 hours of my burying Stan on his favorite beach in Tobago ( we walked almost every day there) I hosted the first ever Social Enterprise Hive in TnT. Very few knew of my profound loss and as any warrior I had on my shield but Marsha came up to me and looked straight and sincerely at my soul and said 'Are you holding up ok?" I lost it and had to run to the bathroom to wipe away my tears. Thanks goodness the event was happening downstairs at Medulla and very few people saw the true state of my reality that has not yet subsided.

Stan will forever be a constant reminder to me of how unconditional love and kindness, giddy tail wagging and joy around others, clear communication of intentions, sincere lingering hugs, unexpected licks, prudent observation, frequent ocean swims with my eye on the ball (not tennis balls;-))  will ensure I leave lasting footprints in this lifetime that I was once here.

During his very last days he taught me something I really never knew about myself and needed to know i.e. my deep capacity to care for others at all costs. I have so many stories in my heart but I can only chuckle really thinking about my mad flashes of lifting all 80 pounds of him into the pool with me in full work clothes swimming with him just holding his head above water. I had to let him know when he looked at me in absolute despair in those last few days that he could hold his weight on his own swimming so he needed to have faith he will also be able to walk again. Twenty four hours  before he left to become Mandela's companion ( I am sure he had  him wrapped around his paws at "woof"), I told Stan what he had been waiting to hear. I told him he could leave now and not to worry because I will always hold him in my heart. And he left the next day.      

 Life is fragile and each day a gift. I am ready to embrace my next 10 year frame. Happy New Year and Welcome 2014!

What happens when there is an epidemic of the "Who knows you" virus!

First my sincere gratitude to the over 1123 of you to date who have taken the time to read my first series of blog posts. You came from 10 different countries and I am truly humbled. I have to admit I would have never guessed what I had to say would be of interest to the over 50+ of you reading my blogs from Russia............. so a special shout out to you and thank you.

I will address "the elephant in the room" during this next series of three blog posts. I look forward to your feedback and comments.  I am warning you this blog contains my controversial point of view where I stick my finger in some of our deepest wounds as a country. It is only my opinion coated with some satire which I humbly feel I can have since I spend everyday growing leaders to ensure it does not continue.


"It is not who you know but who knows you!" Call me naïve but I only first heard of this concept in Trinidad when I tried to create our NGO back in 2010. Silly me thought that just like in the US, you could easily fill out comprehensive forms like a 501c(3) application and in some objective manner you would either qualify to be a tax exempt NGO in 2-12 months ........or get denied with specific reasons. I was quickly enlightened that this is not how it works in TnT. I was given a myriad of  different answers from the general public, business folks and even one of the top international accounting firms locally. They advised that in Trinidad becoming a fully recognized NGO was "subjective" and  it could take 1-5 years. I became curious more than anything else.

What struck with me the most was that everyone had the same caveat which they openly shared with me that went along the lines of ``well if you know someone in BIR ........or more importantly if they know you, well then "yuh business fix". I was appalled and you will need to read on to find out more about my lovely adventures with BIR, with the Minister of Finance and trying to change legislations in this area;-)

I have since that time witnessed this `who knows you` virus in so many regards in day to day Trinidad life. It runs the gammit of the sitting on a Caribbean Airlines flight last month from Barbados and having the Patriarch of one of the most profitable companies in Trinidad sitting in economy and then as the plane takes off, he is boldly moved into first class (public statements have been made that his company is hitting eight 0's in profits in 2013. And we as the public are led to believe  Caribbean Airlines is losing money daily and we all wonder why). I have seen those who get pulled out of a bank lines and taken to the front when others have been standing there for hours. And it does not make you "special " when this happens for you to stand a little taller, in fact, it is deep disrespect to everyone standing there before you. And off course there are those infamous `Notice of Bids and Public Tenders` which brings huge revenues to the media houses. Prior to them being printed, everyone knows the contract and deal is already done with a friend or family or as rumor would have it ........someone willing to pay the 10%. It is sickening really and it explains why we are where we are as a society.

And make no mistake this is where we are:

1. We do not have a "true" democracy that affords us separation of powers and checks and balances. Section 34 and Email Gate.........need I say more?

2. Our Gov`t is made up of " who knows you Imposters" posing as politicians. Just think about this, we know in the US the Democrats stand for increasing taxes, they are for abortion, they are for gay rights etc. and we can take to the bank the Republicans standing for just the opposite. We know what Socialists stand for and even the Communists. Ever wonder what our so called parties in Government stand for?

3. We have "smoke screen" Corporate Governance. Just take a look at all Government and Big business boards.......it is the crème de la crème of the "who know yous". No wonder we have a "death by board meetings syndrome" at all major board meetings in this country since the "who know yous" must get tired of everybody knowing them and have nothing further to contribute.

4. We have a population of sheep who refuse to act, speak up or even think out loud that they deserve better. Quite frankly they are afraid the " who know yous' might get upset with them and not give them the crumbs at the small table.

5. We are not "our brother's keeper" and for this reason we are on a race to get to the bottom of every imaginable black list globally such as crime, lack of transparency, lack of competitiveness etc. etc.

Ok , I will allow you a minute to get over how harsh the above statements are by telling you some ironic positives about the "who knows you" virus;-) Here goes:

1. You only need to be related and have no qualification or experience. And yes you might never ever work at Google EVER.....do you ever hear of the Google CEO hiring his cousin? This is nepotism at its best and the shareholders would have his neck, not to mention his job. But not here in "who knows you" Trinidad. I keep hoping someone would do a family tree of Gov't, State Agencies and Big business and post it up on every key billboard location in TnT.

2. Attitude does not count. Because of who knows you, competitors will not be allowed or have so many hurdles to get into your market and take your business. So do not worry the population will still have to buy from you since they have no choice even if you and your staff have the worst attitude ever and you treat your customers like crap while charging them premium prices.

3. You don't have to worry about making a difference.  Who knows you virus is only dependent on a few things such as your family name, what car you drive, your job title, how close you appear to be with the current Government, and how often a favor is called in for you to sponsor a sports day or some other useless activities that have "0" real sustainable impact etc.

I hope I have made you sign or really angry at this point...........it means I am antagonizing the right sore spots and making you uncomfortable which is where we all think and grow! And please note I actually do not expect you to agree with me fully at all.

Now I will get back to my infamous BIR story. After realizing the obstacles legitimate folks face trying to create proper running NGOs simply due to lack of proper systems and legislation I decided to try and change the NGO legislation. I will wait for you to stop laughing since this is exactly what that big International accounting firm did when I told them what I wanted to do. They promptly then distanced themselves since they sit on one of those "do not rock the boat" Gov't agency boards and well I have to admit I am a tree shaker by birth;-)

Our system needs to be objective and why not use the US or Canadian system that fosters great NGOs and Social Enterprises as a guideline? These countries have Embassies in our country and would only be to happy to lend us expertise and help us along. It seems logical to me.

My next step was an appointment to see THE lawyer overseeing NGOs at BIR.  I am extremely lucky that I do not sound local so everyone gives me an appointment out of pure curiosity. Well after keeping me in his office and old talking for hours inviting some of his colleagues in and openly discussing the files of others in front of me even commenting on " who she did not like and was not approving " ( no idea who she is ), I realized I was wasting my time with BIR. I left a bit heartbroken to tell your the truth.

I then happened to have lunch with the trail  blazing US Ambassador at the time and asked her if the US Embassy could hold a series of seminars on NGO tax legislation for the TnT Gov't to enlighten them on what is proper NGO legislation. All I can say is that the Ambassador left this country so disillusioned since she soon realized she was low down on the "who knows you" pole with the TnT Government.

But not wanting to give up I had a meeting arranged with the then Minister of Finance. Even though I was warned he has a reputation of not ruffling feathers and getting not much done......I always give folks a chance to step up. But I made sure the first thing I asked him when we met after explaining what I wanted was whether his video would match his audio. He paused and the room fell silent but I am not sure if he really heard me. He simply proceeded to have this long discussion about what I was saying was the perfect "catalyst " for society. He really liked hearing himself say that word " catalyst" since he kept saying it over and over.

However, he did surprise me when he made his budget contribution that year by having his advisor send me an email asking for my contribution to NGO legislation change which they even read word for word on national television......"we will be bringing NGO legislation in line with international standards"........blah blah blah! His video never matched his audio and he lived up 200% to his reputation. And more importantly he taught me that the budget reading in this country does not really hold anyone to anything. No checks and balances once again but just some numbers pulled together with some fancy big words to ensure there is confusing chatter involving math going on as the cookie jar is being raped.

All of the above being said, I am not giving up on objective NGO legislation in TnT. We simply have too many NGOs operating in grey areas because the legislation is unclear and subjective and that is no environment for them to thrive. And I will say this out loud, those of us wanting to change the world do it through our NGOs and social enterprises..........not politics. Take a look at how Bill Gates, Richard Branson, Bill Clinton are spending their time changing this world......it is through their work at their Foundations.

In the end, nobody knows me and I like it that way! I enjoy crossing all lines of race, class and social standing. It gives me great insight and perspective. I meet most of the "who knows you" at least one time until they realize I do not care "who knows them". Some of the more enlightened and eccentric  "who knows you" have actually become friends since in my company they get to exhale a little ( it takes some real work to be a who knows you 24/7) but they then go back to their world which is their comfort zone.

My hope is I will not give up and this Universe will allow me to sit back one day and witness the eradication of the  "who knows you" virus. I think I want to replace it with the " I heard about you virus" which infects the game changers,disruptors and leaders of tomorrow we are growing by the thousands (10,000 by the end of this school year alone). They will be their brother's keepers and will use their hands to lift up Trinidad and Tobago.

If NGOs had any say in TnT education, here's what we would do ..........

Let's face it, thousands of students in TnT are not getting the education they deserve and we are paying for as a nation.  

Our youths are often forced to attend chronically under performing public schools (Gov't and denominational)  in their communities. Others struggle to fit their learning styles or personalities to outdated educational models that does not meet their needs.

Our students are leaving schools (from Primary to University)  with "0" Intelligence. Intelligence is defined but not limited to: abstract thought, understanding, self-awareness, communication, reasoning, learning, having emotional knowledge, retaining, planning, and problem solving. And yes I do get that some of you will say our children graduate high school and our education system is so advanced that they can enter second year University abroad. But please note Education does not equal Intelligence. And you just need to look at where we are at today as a nation to recognise our so called "advanced education system' is getting us nowhere fast.

We have illiteracy rates through the roof. According to a recent article I read in the local paper some 50% of our population is illiterate. Some of you  might say well that is expected in a developing country. But you just need to a look at places like Kerala, India. They do not have our resources. They are not even considered to be "developing" but more on the "poor" side by world standards and yet they have a 100% literacy rate. So I am going to ask the "elephant in the room" question.... why are we purposely keeping our population illiterate?

As a side note, I encourage any NGO seriously interested in impacting the literacy issue locally to study how they did it in Kerala in under 5 years. It not only worked but we can carbon copy their methods since they have VERY similar demographics and underlying issues.

Our "supposed leaders of tomorrow" are unprepared with no understanding or practise in their area of gift and talent, unintelligent (as I defined above) and as a result limited in their short-term and long-term potential as not only Local Game Changers but as Global Warriors of Change. The exceptions  who make it actually have to leave TnT to do so.

And before I continue, I want to humbly state my opinion on this subject is first hand as the founder of a NGO, The Growing Leaders Foundation. September 2013 will be our three year anniversary in TnT impacting over 15,000 youths with our leadership and soft skills programs....all of which we have carefully and systematically documented, measured and tested.

Our problems are not new. Twenty years ago, the US faced the same dilemma and they opened their country's first alternative to public education called a "Charter School" in Minnesota. Same situation happened in Alberta, Canada which created their own brand of Charter School to “provide innovative or enhanced education programs that improve the acquisition of student skills, attitudes, and knowledge in some measurable way.” In fact if Canada has a “school choice capital”, it is Calgary. The city boasts six charter schools that has 5,930 students. The number of students in Calgary charter schools has more than tripled over the past decade. Recently New Zealand's Ministry of Education (note New Zealand is amongst the highest ranking countries in the world for quality of education to youths) decided to implement their own model of a pilot Charter School program to ensure they are addressing all the "weak links' in their education chain with alternative education solutions. Here is the link to learn more:
http://www.minedu.govt.nz/~/media/MinEdu/Files/TheMinistry/PublicationsAndResources/RISDevelopingAndImplementingNZCharterSchoolModel.pdf

Charter Schools are:

• innovative public schools;

• designed by educators, parents, or civic leaders;

• open and attended by choice;

• free from most rules and regulations governing conventional public schools;

• and, accountable for results.

 

Charter Schools in many respects combine the most favourable attributes of both private and public schools. Like a private school, a Charter School is able to provide a customised learning environment. No two charter schools are alike; some offer thematic or specialised curriculum such as a pure arts based academy (music, visual arts, dance, drama, and creative writing), marine science program etc. while others focus on the basics. Some charter schools look like traditional public schools; others offer on line classes and may not even have a physical campus. What charters do have in common, though, is that they are places where meaningful parental and teacher involvement is encouraged, valued and mobilised fast without Governmental interference.

Now, let's take a look at TnT. What is the one area that TnT has always shined in historically because of our rich history and cultural composition as a nation? That's right...the Arts (music, visual arts, dance, drama, design, and creative writing). Knowing this, do we have a full fledged Arts Academy starting from High School with the brightest and best (internationally and locally) harvesting our creative golden eggs? Well, off course not!

Now imagine our magnificent historic buildings around the Savannah. Yes, the ones we have all forgotten and are now abandoned. What if we FINALLY  refurbished them and have them serve as the first of a few High School Charter Arts Academies in TnT.

Let's face it, these forgotten historical monuments of our nation have  "eyes, ears and roots of our compelling history." And just  maybe our children can honor them as they rightly deserve.

Just imagine from Queens Royal College all the way to Stollmeyer's Castle closed off to vehicular traffic. What if this new pedestrian only gateway became a bustling creative hub with students outdoors rehearsing their new mad pan compositions, dance routines etc. And what if on evenings after work we can all gather under the moon to view screenings of their new films on the lawns outdoors of our great Savannah. Imagine being able to just feel, see and hear that energy of our young people in the heart of POS.

 

In a split second the Savannah can become our very own true Central Park with meandering walk ways, ponds, and organic gardens with signs of life, possibility and the bright future for TnT we all dream about but do nothing to make it real.

 

And for those ready to criticise me about dismantling the Savannah in some way to give to our nation's youths, before you say anything let me know please the number of times you have actually walked the circumference of the Savannah or EVER ENTERED IT and walked the it's length and breath......... other than to cross a stage at Carnival time.

Ever since arts instruction was introduced into schools with drawing and singing in the middle of the nineteenth century, a fiery debate has raged over the role of the arts in education or the pursuit or arts as an alternative to traditional education. Eric Jensen, the author of Arts with the Brain in Mind, compiled and reviewed research studies on the arts, the brain, and learning, which has convinced many that the arts are vital to educating our children and should be taught every day in our schools, just like language arts, math, science, and social studies. Arts with the Brain in Mind serves as Jensen’s treatise for a new found advocacy.

In short, if the right side of the brain that holds the creativity "muscle" is not being exercised daily in our nation's children they WILL NOT excel brilliantly in any area whatsoever. Even Einstein was more a right brain thinker more than anything else!

And one last thought, I want you to think about something else. I am sure I am not the only one who has noticed. Why do we have more primary schools than anywhere else in the world? We have approx. 483 schools for about 131,000 primary aged students according to official reports. Using Singapore as an example, they have 171 school for over 300,000 primary aged students. Singapore is ranked fifth in the world leading global education ranking system. Here is the official listing:

• Finland
• South Korea
• Hong Kong
• Japan
• Singapore
• United Kingdom
• The Netherlands
• New Zealand
• Switzerland
• Canada

So am I missing something or do we simply have too many ineffective schools in TnT?

Maybe a first step can be to close down at least half of the primary schools in this country and consolidate the existing ones into a combo of properly managed and effective public and charter schools? And yes I know transport comes to mind but if we get a proper student busing system as the rest of the world does in place to alleviate traffic and travel issues for students and parents, it will work quite nicely.  Just a parting thought;-)

PERSONAL NOTE
This is the last blog post in my four part series. Hope you still think I have something to say in June. Until then, stay cool, use your hands to bring others up and be great!

Why Tobago should be the horse and Trinidad the cart!

"Welcome to Tobago" says the Immigration Officer after our long transit flight from the UK. She smiles, asks us a few questions, stamps our passports and merrily tells us "Enjoy your stay and make sure and check out our Jazz Festival!"

 

For most foreigners and locals (who have lived abroad), Trinidad and Tobago are two entirely separate countries with Tobago being the "diamond in the rough".

This picture above was taken by me a few weeks ago. It is of a family sitting on the Grange Bay sea wall in Tobago watching the sun set. The father and daughter squealed in delight every time a large wave came in. Black, White, Indian and Mixed families from all walks of life and economic backgrounds with fellow tourists all sat together enjoying the simple yet breath-taking spectacle of the sun setting which the Universe gives us as a gift to end each day.

Now take a look at this picture below.

Every week youths from the three special needs schools/organisations in Tobago take a road trip to Healing with Horses in Buccoo where they are exposed to therapy outdoors with the horses. There are days they are treated to organic gardening and nature walks and do not even let me get started about the amazing yoga classes these children enjoy on the cliff tops of Buccoo where they chant with Glorious Elspeth to the ocean below them. Ground breaking work is being done by NGOs in Tobago. The Yahweh Foundation, SOS Turtles etc. are trailblazing the future of Tobago's youths and communities. And the world is paying attention! You cannot help but notice immediately the caliber of volunteers and professionals you find in Tobago from all over the world (Germany, Sweden, UK, US, Austria etc.) who all fly in to work with local NGOs.

There is a saying that "if it walks like a duck and acts like a duck....it must be a duck!". Well, Tobago is showing all signs of what the experts in the urban planning world refers to as the phenomenon of  "POCKET NEIGHBOURHOODS". Typically Pocket Neighbourhoods are clustered groups of neighbouring houses or apartments gathered around shared open space i.e. a garden, courtyard, series of joint backyards etc. - all fostering a strong sense of community among neighbours where they easily get to know one another, where empty nesters/far-flung families can find a helping hand nearby and where children can have shirt-tail aunties and uncles just beyond their front gate. One only has to be in Tobago during Harvest season to experience the sense of community within the larger community. 

Now, just imagine how possible a proper "POCKET NEIGHBOURHOOD" can be if one or two of the major oil and gas companies picked up and decided to move their head-quarters or create satellite centers in Tobago. In doing so they work out with the THA the creation of a proper urban planned pocket community (photo above of Seaside Florida) with an international school run by GEMS or RAFFLES with an ARTS, IB and British curriculum within the community itself. Students should be able to go to school on their bicycle.  Also within the community there must be world class health care (also possible medical tourism for Tobago) with a flag like John Hopkins. I am not going to ignore the fact that it will take some heavy hitters to make this happen and it will require  world class education and health care for any international company to even consider this proposal . And make no mistake, I am purposely choosing the oil and gas sector since it is the only truly international sector in TnT who spends major dollars through their corporate social responsibility programs developing the communities they live and work in. And if a large oil and gas company moves to Tobago with it's entire team, Trinidad has to pay attention since they will without a doubt be bringing major revenues to Tobago.

With the almost non-existent crime, sense of community, breath-taking beauty and proud and patriotic people,  do you not think Tobago can serve as a role model for Trinidad, internally and globally?

Now by no means am I saying Tobago is perfect. I have heard there is a large international drug trade in Tobago but I have never heard about a gang related shoot out in Tobago because of drugs.  Have you? I have also heard incest is far more significant in Tobago. But until I hear this out of the mouths of the two women I respect as warriors in this area, Diana Mahabir-Wyatt and Verna Rose Greaves, I have to believe Tobago is no worst that Trinidad. And I also want to add given the size of Tobago we can truly make the effort and utilise resources to incubate and solve the "incest" issue once and for all in Tobago and also Trinidad.

What I can tell you is that I was ready to pack up and leave TnT after just one year living part-time in Trinidad. I gave up like so many others before me who thought they could make a difference or who saw the world through a "global" lens. It is extremely impossible if you plan on being a "Warrior for Change' (after living and working abroad for the majority of ones life) to come back and live and work in Trinidad. The anger, hurt, vindictiveness and pure negativity of the overall surroundings breaks ones soul...literally.

But Tobago stopped me from fleeing. And I will say this to anyone listening, before you pack up and leave Trinidad, try moving to Tobago first! In it's simplicity it brought me the much needed faith I had lost at warp speeds in Trinidad . I was able to "see" again what is possible and can be done to bring about a better TnT sitting in Tobago. Every day I come across the likes of Alvin the fisherman who meticulously fillets his fish for his customers and when asked about his job happily tells you that he is the luckiest man in the world to do what he loves every day i.e. spear diving.  And then there is 'Tall Man' who spends a full hour washing your car giving it back to you so clean you can eat lunch of your car mats. And not to be forgotten are my wonderful neighbours, who every morning look out for me to say 'Good Morning". Elaine, to the right, saves fresh bread for my Husband every time she bakes and flatters him telling him he looks younger that George Clooney ( I keep reminding him about that local word mamaguy). She has a laugh so infectious the whole of Tobago can hear her on her porch on evenings chatting up her church buddies. And there is absolutely no shame when she tells her story of working as a house keeper in the US for over 20 years to save up and buy her piece of land on the hill to build her house that overlooks the sprawling ocean. And then below me is Nelson. He just "shakes his head" when he sees me these days I am sure remembering a few months back when I asked him to help me scale my fence because I forgot my gate control in the house. Tobagonians truly are in every way very proud, caring and extremely patriotic people.

So just in case you are still wondering why I am suggesting that Tobago should be the horse....

Studies have shown over and over again that any successful long term impactful change in people's behaviour comes about faster when we study "those getting it right" within their own communities. Once we know what that "common thread' is, we then mimic it and stamp it with those households not functioning or with those individuals falling through the cracks. In other words the focus should be on the "sprouts of good" and not all the bad around us growing like grass. Think about it, have you ever read a study or anything really EVER on what is "going right" in the households of the few youths in Laventille who top their exams and go on to college etc. In my last three years in TnT, I seem to only read about the negatives of Laventille.

And as a result, I have come to conclusion that there is so much going right in Tobago that it can actually, given it's size and already existent "pocket community" attributes, serve as a incubator to lead the way to help Trinidad not only find solutions to crime but also deal with the break-down of family and community. With a little bit of tweaking, Tobago holds all the answers to Trinidad's social problems and the rest of the world seems to have already taken note. Don't you not agree?
 

FOR THOSE OF YOU INTERESTED IN POCKET NEIGHBORHOODS....continue reading:

Why are Pocket Neighborhoods important now?

The fabric of social health in our society has been fraying, in part because many people lack networks of personal and social support. Family members can be spread across the country, friends live across town, and neighbors don’t know one another. A listening ear or helping hand is not available when it’s most needed.

Pocket neighborhoods can help mend a web of belonging, care and support. Their protected setting encourages informal interaction among neighbors, laying the ground for caring relationships. An elderly neighbor may need assistance trimming a hedge. Another needs help looking after the kids while going for a short errand, or feeding a cat while away on vacation. Nearby neighbors are the ones most available to respond to daily needs. They are also the ones to hear a story, admire a newly planted garden bed, or reminisce about old times. All of these encounters strengthen webs of support and friendship, which are the basis for healthy, livable communities.

How is a Pocket Neighborhood different than a regular neighborhood?

A pocket neighborhood is not the wider neighborhood of several hundred households and network of streets, but a realm of a dozen or so neighbors who interact on a daily basis around a shared garden, quiet street or alley — a kind of secluded neighborhood within a neighborhood.

The wider neighborhood is where you might describe “the red house on the corner of Elm and Main Street”— a local landmark that helps define and give character to a neighborhood. You may know some of these neighbors, but likely not the hundreds that live there. In most neighborhoods, streets are public, yards and gardens are private, but protected semi-public spaces are unusual.

In a pocket neighborhood, neighbors have a shared stake in the common ground they live next to. Because of their watchfulness, strangers are taken note of and children are free to play. Neighbors are on a first-name basis: “Tom and Melissa live across the way.” These are the first ones to call on in an emergency, and the closest to join you for an impromptu order of takeout pizza.

Why are pocket neighborhoods so good for children?

Children need increasingly larger zones of play as they grow up. A baby explores the room their parent is in, while an older sibling is free to play in the next room, or in the back yard. At some point, though, their desire to explore the world beyond the front gate is blocked by the real and perceived “stranger danger” and danger from traffic. Children are then chauffeured to friends’ houses and organized activities until they can drive on their own. Too often, children feel painfully isolated and lack access to safe, unplanned play.

Pocket neighborhoods provide a protected, traffic-free environment for a child’s widening horizon — a place for unplanned play alone and with other children, and a place to have relationships with caring adults other than parents. This matches their growing curiosity, need for increased responsibilities and maturing social skills.

Why is shared outdoor space so important?

The shared outdoor space at the center of a cluster of homes is a key element of a pocket neighborhood. Residents surrounding this common space take part in its care and oversight, thereby enhancing a felt and actual sense of security and identity.

This shared space has clearly defined boundaries — beginning at the entrance from the street and extending to the gates of the private yards — creating a felt sense of territory by anyone who enters. A stranger walking into the commons is likely to be addressed with a friendly, “can I help you?” At the same time, a 6-year-old’s mom is likely to feel at ease in allowing her daughter to explore the “bigger world” beyond the front door.

During the daily flow of life through this commons space, nearby neighbors offer ‘nodding hellos’, or stop for a chat on the porch. These casual conversations can eventually grow to caring relationships and a meaningful sense of community — all fostered by the simple fact of shared space.

Community sounds good, but does it come at the expense of privacy?

While there are many examples and kinds of pocket neighborhoods, privacy is an essential ingredient that allows residents to have a positive experience of community. In a classic cottage courtyard community, there are several increasingly private ‘layers of personal space’ between the shared commons and the front door: next to the sidewalk is a border of perennial plantings and a low fence with a swinging gate; then the private front yard; the frame of the covered porch with a low railing and flower boxes; and the porch itself, which is large enough to be an outdoor room. Within the cottages, the layering continues with active spaces oriented toward the commons and private spaces further back and above.

To ensure privacy between neighbors, the cottages ‘nest’ together: the ‘open’ side of one house faces the ‘closed’ side of the next. You could say the houses are spooning! The open side has large windows facing its side yard (which extends to the face of neighboring house), while the closed side has high windows and skylights. The result is that neighbors do not peer into one another’s world.

 

Is this meant to be affordable housing?

It can work well for affordable housing. It can also be the choice for affluent communities.

What are these design principles?

Successful pocket neighborhoods start with the central idea of a limited number of dwellings gathered around a shared commons. When the number gets larger than 8 or 12, other clusters form around separate shared commons, connected by walkways. Multiple clusters can form a larger aggregate community. These communities are not isolated to themselves, like a gated community, but connect and contribute to the character and life of the surrounding neighborhood. It is essential that cars and traffic do not invade the shared pedestrian space. The active rooms of the homes, including front porches, face the commons rather than turning their back to neighbors. As noted above, there is a layering of public to private space, and careful placement of windows to ensure privacy for each dwelling. These are core design principles, essentially.

In many pocket neighborhoods, residents park their cars away from their homes, having them walk through the shared common area on the way to their front doors. Is this viable in cold climates?
This relationship between the car door and front door greatly increases the level of interaction among neighbors and strengthens their bonds. For many people, the short walk is not considered a hardship, even in snowy or rainy climates. That said, others feel that having an attached garage is an amenity or requirement that outweighs the community-building benefits of the walk through the commons. It’s still a pocket neighborhood, but with fewer chances to meet.

The Crime Problem among others things can be solved within the Military Framework............BUT not within the box we are envisioning!

Would you like to see every citizen of Trinidad and Tobago become hard-working, respectful, disciplined, honorable and prepared for life in a global economy? Would you like to see crime, teenage pregnancy and substance abuse rates decline? No, this is not an advertisement for a magic pill; this is an argument for (1) mandatory two year military-style education starting at the age of 17 followed by (2) mandatory one year civic style service  (e.g. as police, fire fighter, teacher, etc.) in Trinidad and Tobago.

I envision at least two state of the art facilities with one located in North Trinidad and the other in Charlotteville Tobago. It will be managed like the oil and gas sector, the only true functioning sector in our country that works and gives us the largest portion of our GDP specifically b/c it is run by foreigners with no local intervention. Only the best in this field globally can participate i.e. Royal Military College of Canada, Royal Military College Sandhurst (yes alums include Prince Harry and PrinceWilliam)  etc.  The agreement with them will be irrevocable for the next 20 years at least and their mandate shall be to deliver to the nation 20 year olds possessing the following traits:

• literacy
• fully aware and have honed their areas of gifts, talents (be it in academics, the arts, a trade, sport or otherwise)
• true leadership abilities (at their core servant, situational and other leadership fundamentals)
• have a level of character that few others in the world have
• are collectively conscious , curious and creative citizens
• are part of a diverse unified melting pot regardless of class or race
• patriotic
• wants to give back to TnT through service

And before you stop reading and begin to criticize my idea, read through this entire blog post please!

Guess what Quatar (richest country in the world), South Korea (record growth in the integration into high tech modern world), Singapore (in top 5 least corrupt countries in the world), Austria, Bermuda, Norway, Sweden, Switzerland and some 20 other countries in the world have in common? First, the majority of them have the lowest crime rates on any world index but more important and second is that they all have mandatory military service in some form with Qatar being the most lenient and introducing the concept as recent at 2008 into their actual education system with focused incubator periods for males.

I think we can all agree we have reached the tipping point in this country when it comes to crime and how the world sees us. Just this week we were named in the bottom ten tourist destinations in the world, THE ONLY CARIBBEAN COUNTRY to be so far down the list. How did this happen and why have we done nothing as citizens? Where is our voice? Have we all rolled over on the side of the road waiting to see if anything else hits us?

Well  this is my humble attempt to try and turn this around. I came up with this idea after spending the last two years working with youths at both St Michaels and the Youth Training Center. I have the benefit of comparing my experiences with "incarcerated' boys to "free" youths i.e. in public, denominational and private schools. At YTC, the re-entry rates are over 70% and the reason was obvious to me. There was no structure and nobody had a plan they executed consistently on the minute a lad walked through the door. Quite frankly, with the exception of one or two decent human beings I came across fighting the system, everyone else was a ghost occupying a uniform, collecting a salary, waiting to get promoted to heaven which was not there. And I can basically say the end result is the same for the youths "slipping through the cracks"  at the schools. Parents are not really around, there are no real value systems in the home and basically these youths are being set up to live mediocre lives learning to follow blindly like obedient sheep versus being enpowered to embrace their own natural leadership abilities in their areas of gifts/talents, question everything and most importantly speak up.

So in looking to fix the root of the crime problem, we can agree that we complain collectively about:

• The disintegration of the family and value system in the homes
• Youths out of control because of lack of discipline and structure
• Illiteracy and its contribution to crime
• The inability of the Government to impact crime even though hundreds of millions are spent (weekly, monthly or annually.....who knows really?)

But how do we solve it? Well we got close with Colin Powell. Many of you will recall that US Ambassador Beatrice Wilkinson Welters (love her) brought Colin Powell to TnT to be the flag for a project on crime prevention in 2010. Sadly it never took off. Not for a lack of resources but because we failed to execute. Yet again we somehow convinced ourselves that any "foreign idea or concept" presented to us, we without any training, knowledge or ability, can do it better ourselves. Everytime we fail and get nowhere. Take a look at this video with Colin Powell on TED and you will understand why I think he was the right guy and could have helped us back then. I do not think today the Americans want anything to do with us since we have "0" credibility with them. 

http://www.ted.com/talks/colin_powell_kids_need_structure.html

Now let it be clear I am not proposing Military style training schools that some of you are visualizing like in Afghanistan with war training etc. What  I am talking about is a world-class incubation (away from the regular environment in TnT that is infecting our youths minds in the worst way possible) for two years where they are forced to be in a melting pot of all citizens from rich and poor homes, religious and secular backgrounds, different shades of skin, smart and slow, disabled, healthy, courageous and hesitant. They will all be treated equally placing the same demands and entrusting the same responsibilities regardless of creed, ethnicity, or other labels and affiliations. They will learn about each other and help each other through physical, mental, organizational and creative challenges under strict behavioral codes but nurtured and guided by the best in the world. And my only requirement outside of their standard set up is we have "local" grannies as house-mothers. We have hundreds of old people in this country who feel helpless about where we have reached and who will jump at the opportunity to lend a hand in a controlled nurturing environment. They can share their stories and pass on their knowledge and yes they will be the bridge for the those without family support when they graduate from the academy. And yes, I know some of you are thinking they can be our "local" eyes and ears for us just to make sure those foreigners are treating our children right;-)

This will be followed by one year of civic duty. Just look at New Zealand which has mandatory national civic service and you will learn how it gives its citizens a chance to rally around a shared cause which develops respect for people, their belongings and their property. In short it promotes patriotism and strengthens the spirit of citizenship.

And yes I do know the biggest backlash for this idea will come from the upper class who like things the way they they are so they can continue to remain "Head Crab in the Barrel". But like all mandatory systems there will be some "cop-out" regulations like if your child gets accepted in a University abroad etc. However, this country we will be offering world class academic education, cutting edge arts program and alternative training in a structured environment from the best in the world for free . Those who harbor a  "run-away" mentality in their children will be in the minority.

And of course we will have the majority of youths complaining about the 6am wake up calls, early morning drills before class, heavy homework, early curfews coupled with taking full responsibility for cleanliness of their rooms, shining their shoes, doing their own laundry, short hair cuts, unfashionable clothing etc. etc. But the invaluable lessons of cooperation, team building and strength of mind will make them into true leaders who can take this country forward. I can guarantee you they will be our source of pride and save us all.

I will end by proposing a pilot be set up commencing September 2013 to run over the next year with this new initiative going into law effective January 2015 for all youths. I know exactly how, where and when to get this pilot mobilized in record time. But I just deleted the rest of this paragraph because I was just told by someone I trust, do not share specifics since "they" will know how to stop you. So in the interest of " ensuring I do"....sorry guys;-)

 

In concluding, a holistic mandatory military based education would spawn a chain of events that would transform Trinidad and Tobago and may just be the only solution out there to truly cure all our ills. And really what is the worst case? We will reduce the obesity rates and have some truly physically fit citizens (kidding off course). Now you can tell me what you think!

Only Speak if you can add Positive Value to Silence

In honor of International Woman's day and 2013 being the year of my big 30++++*  birthday ( yes I am one of those women) and my 15 year wedding anniversary, I decided it was time you hear what I have to say. Here goes.....my first blog (nervous excited for your feedback) ;-) And I did send this article to the local paper hoping they will pick it up as a column but ......I scare people a lot so this might be the only sure way to read it!

By no means am I a professional writer. I am nowhere close to Ira Mathur or Sunity Maharaj, our local superstars in this field. However, that being said, I can humbly say I have something to say which is the byline of this series of four articles I will write over the next few weeks offering solutions. So here goes!

I am, like many of you, suffocating and choking on the tirades of negativity in Trinidad and Tobago as a whole. I actually think we, citizens, have systematically decided to keep ourselves spinning in a tornado of defeat and destruction so we simply are unable to find calm within ourselves to think and act.

Who really can start their day hoping to dance in a downpour of positivity after reading and listening to the hole we have dug ourselves into first thing every morning? There is simply no platform to share, consistently and abundantly, good inspiring stories which any progressive country can tell you is the key to move its people and country forward. Just pick up the Gulf News daily paper to understand how happy stories can make you feel good….even healthy. Better yet think about the last time you tore out anything from the local paper saving it thinking what a great idea or how can I help this person I just read about realize their dreams or I have to share this story or I have to look into this further?

So what is the solution? Well first I had to test my theory about there being mainly negativity around us. I chose the daily papers as my medium. I took a few local papers into one of my classrooms and I asked my students (ages 8-12) to find happy positive words in the first five pages of each paper. A few students happened to find one word “Fabulous” in an advertisement on page 4 of one paper.  And that was it! I did this over one month and everyday was the same except for the recent story on the young man from Hilo which made the first few pages of all the papers. He is now forgotten of course when in fact he should probably be paid by TDC and all the major cell-phone companies branding fees as a “true” TnT Ambassador in their ads versus the “infamous” ones they throw money at who do not represent the values we want to install in our country and more importantly our youths.

It is a fact that when you pour buckets of negative thoughts into your minds, your thoughts are infected subconsciously. Your thoughts become your words which in turn become your actions. And we wonder why so many of us are angry, defeated and plain vex by 9am!

Now real quick, think about the few happy positive people you know and go to their Facebook wall. You will notice there is a plethora of positive quotes, happy photos, inspiring stories etc. Did a light bulb just go off? Digest now the mindsets we set each day for our population. What about the mindsets we are passing on to our children daily?

So what is my solution? I will start first with Government and offer the following idea:

First, it should be inscribed somewhere in parliament front and center in large bold letters the following words “ONLY SPEAK UP IF YOU CAN ADD POSITIVE VALUE TO SILENCE”. Yes, I too have my suspicion that we might hear only crickets for days or weeks in Parliament after this becomes the modus operandi but at least we might get some Ministers/ Senators thinking for the first time ever or just maybe many of them might quit after truly hearing their own conscience.

 

Second, I will do some decorating in Parliament and install a huge mirror at the entry into Parliament chambers with a camera above it that attaches to a huge screen outdoors that the public can watch. At this entry mirror, each Minister/Senator as he or she enters must stop and take this simple oath weekly for the citizens to not only see but also as a reminder to himself or herself of why he or she is there. The oath is as follows:  “I understand my role as a Minister /Senator is not about me or for my personal gain, I am here only to serve my country and its citizens. I have a duty to leave my country more abundant and better than I found it for the nation’s children”. The reason for this is that by simple repetition it becomes ingrained in the minds of every Minister/Senator their job description and with time they will believe it and act on it. It is a form of brain washing for a good result but desperate times require ‘back to basics’ creativity.

Third, I think we should require that all Minister/Senators be given Twitter training i.e. so they learn the gift of getting to the point with the fewest words possible.  I would also add in here that each sentence they speak out loud in Chambers or to the public must contain a positive adjective in it. I am not joking here. We sadly have reached the stage where we have to treat our Ministers/Senators like school children and teach them how to be polite and positive in the way they speak with each other and to us. I am sure I am not the only one who has noticed that they  all seem to have the contagious virus of “ignorant senseless word usage” which has resulted in “unexplainable irrational actions.” 

Here is my solution for media houses:

I would  encourage and reward all newspapers  to ensure that the  first five pages of their paper is at least 50% filled with inspiring encouraging news, stories and ideas that includes a positive inspiring cover image. And if the staff writers cannot think it up themselves, I encourage the media houses to create alliances with other foreign papers and borrow their stories until we are ready.  Some type of similar methodology would all be applied to radio except for Marsha Miranda’s show which rocks. What this does is at first glance is uplift our state of mind and spirits. It allows us the choice as readers to stop reading after page 5 since we know that will be the drama section and just like the movies we can choose to not show up in those pages.

And finally the solution for our corporates:

I would pass some zoning laws for all those wretched billboards alongside the roads requiring all advertising to contain educational positive inspiring messages. A media council will be set up and all street billboard ads will have to pass the council’s approval. Make no mistake 75% of those sitting on that council will be University, secondary school and high school students and the other 25% of the members cannot be from the “family tree” of the current Government in power whoever that may be.  So an example for companies selling alcohol is that they will be permitted to do billboards on road safety and no drinking and driving. Food companies can do educational ads on healthy eating, exercise. Energy companies can do green and environmental campaigns etc.  You don’t have to do a hard sell to build a brand and develop customer loyalty!

 

And yes I know, you are all thinking my solutions are simplistic and a bit off the wall but I know for a fact after having spent thousands of hours with many good decent Trinbagonians volunteering to grow leaders in this country for the last two years, that with a few tablespoons of encouragement, positivity, inspiration and hope we can change mindsets. When we change mindsets, we are changing the way people “see” themselves and their role in society which causes them to act differently. Change in action will alter the course of our country’s future.

And make no mistake, the track we are on is transporting our nation’s children into a dark tunnel where the only light is that of an incoming train.  So let us make the effort to speak out loud to the Universe words that add a positive value to silence and even though we might not enjoy the fruits of those words, our children will and I cannot think of a better investment and legacy of our limited time here.  Can you?